In this fine county in southern California, Jury Duty is required of any eligible citizen with a legal residency status , a drivers license, and/or registered to vote.
You are not expected to serve jury duty unless its been a year and a day since your last summons.
On that note, receiving the summons for jury duty was received with anything resembling fanfare, joy or applause. In this day and age when REAL mail is rare- card, letter, gift certificate, free coupons- receiving an envelope with your name spelled correctly can cause the heart to flutter with joy.
Checking the mailbox at the curb, my heart did that little jump at the envelope appearing to be "REAL" mail. As I removed the envelope, and seeing the return address as the Riverside Superior Court, I heard an inner scream to leave the summons there and hope it got returned to the post office the next day! Grudgingly, I brought the envelope in. It sat on my kitchen counter for days before I even opened it. Nothing but bad news occupies that envelope! Through the plastic window of the envelope I can see the large words JURY SUMMONS. Didn't I just serve on jury duty a few months ago? I remember that day vividly. How can it be my turn again? My last name begins with a Z. Shouldn't I be chosen last??? I am for everything else!
Before opening the summons, I double check the dates of my last jury service. Sure as I live and breathe, its been 18 months. Darn it! I tried to decipher what the dates of the summons were before opening it. Screams and cries of NOOOOO echoed in my head. There was nothing for it but to dive in and read the dang thing. I can't ignore it. I would be one of the prosecuted summoms evaders for sure. My luck runs that way.
First thing I verify is the dates. Yes, I am free those dates. DANG IT!!
I read the 8 reasons to be excused from Jury Duty. No to all of those. I'm able bodied and mentally stable. Though many people would beg otherwise, I'm qualified. I can't lie. I'm stuck.
Marking the date on my calendar in blood red with skull and cross bones, I admit, I'm bitter. My free time is valuable to me. I do not like to drive on the freeway in traffic and search for legal parking around the court house. The whole judicial process is as slow as molasses, and inefficient with time management.
The day arrives. I haven't slept all night . I am stressed out. Certainly that will be obvious enough to excuse me from the court room. Who wants a sweaty old woman serving on their jury?
I need to add that I get called to Jury Duty every 18 months to 2 years ad I have been on a jury many times. Shouldn't that be a reason to drop my name from the Jury Pool list? I'm used up and tainted. I have friends who have NEVER been summoned for jury duty, even though they would enjoy the experience and have been licensed drivers and voters for decades! Tempted to send a list with their names and addresses to the County Clerk for future summons if they could drop mine.
I do believe in a fair trial, innocent until proven guilty and due process of the law. A jury of peers to hear your case is promised. Well, trust me, I have yet to serve on a jury and consider myself the defendants "peer". My peer group are upstanding , law abiding citizens who do not rape and pillage innocent people, sell drugs or rob banks, assault people with vehicles , or stab their friend the gangster in the name of their "hood". Perhaps because I live in a questionable "Hood" this makes me a peer ?
Waiting in the line to enter the courthouse at 7:30 a.m., its a somber day out, drizzling and cold and here I am with no sweater and no umbrella.
The long list of prohibited items was posted clearly long before the line got to the front doors. Listed was the obvious. . . firearms, blades, sharp pokey objects, sprays. Also on this list is liquids and food. It was the TSA list of no-no's.
A woman leaving the building asks the line to excuse her as she cuts through it and heads for the planter by the building to retrieve her bottle of "perfume" and lip gloss. This causes a stir with the ladies surrounding me who are horrified that their makeup may be considered contraband or an illegal court substance. They begin to raise their objections to be heard by the sheriff guarding the doors in between gulping down their oversized Lattes and cylinders of green tea. They are most vocal about being forced to stand outside and suffer in the 60 degree weather, which is ruining their hair. (perhaps they could have found a can of hairspray in the bushes hidden amongst the discarded lighters, pocket knives and fingernail clippers. )
I kept to myself throughout the entire day. The only words I uttered were "Here" twice. I was called to report to a jury room, only to be dismissed at the last minute. You didn't have to tell me twice that my service was over for a year. Relief and overwhelming joy at this new good fortune. See Lori run. Run Lori Run! Home before the traffic , home in time to start dinner and home without worrying over the fate of some unfortunate individual who made poor choices in life, leaving chaos in their wake for their victims and feel they shouldn't be forced to pay for their mistakes.
I've done my civic duty.
Hoping I am done for at least 2 years for next go around.
I'm doing my best to stay out of trouble with the law!
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