Lost in IKEA

It's been a long time, years even, since we have visited an IKEA store.

There's something  inviting about the clean lines of the Sweeds, and touring the mini cube houses displayed there, and it's always nice to freshen up on my Sweedish now and then.

Our own home would have to be described as anything but modern or streamlined. I had an interior designer claim it was decorated in the Contemporary style. Perhaps this was a nice way of avoiding  saying it resembled "mid-century clutter" or "Hod-Podge Décor". All the same, visiting the Swiss store gives hope for some sort of mess management and clean living.
 

I have friends who make the IKEA trek yearly, spending an afternoon there, having lunch, enjoying Swedish meatballs and fish. Sorry. Passing on that experience, hating both, and throw in the tasteless cookies along with it. I'll just fill up on cheese and the cardboard like crackers.

As we drove into the parking lot of the Costa Mesa IKEA, we wondered if there was some sort of event occurring as there was no parking in the Disneyland sized parking lot. This just made us all the more determined to fight our way into the store to see what bargains we might be missing out on, and secured a parking spot only a block away from the entrance. We exited the car and followed the legions of people into the store. I picked up a stray cart on the way in to use as handbag carrier and walker. That was mistake 1.

There didn't seem to be a clear entrance into the store, and the elevator up didn't seem large enough for my enormous cart, so we made our way to the other end only to discover this was parcel pick up and no show room access. Back to the other end of the store and decide to cut through the check out ...Mistake 2.

We wander around these aisles for awhile, wondering where all the housewares and junk are?  Continuing our progress toward the expansive ground floor, we find our way going against the people flow until we finally find our way into the show rooms with the "good stuff". Mistake 3.

The place is packed. Obviously, this IS the event for families to visit IKEA on a Saturday afternoon. There are hundreds of people here, all pushing along various types of carts and bags. We are trying to find where the entrance to this place is. Obviously we have come the back way, continuing our meandering through the crowd and following the many exit arrows that indicate store flow, but doing it backwards.  Mistake 4.

We kept seeing stuff that we liked but passed on because we were determined to find the beginning and follow the arrows like we were supposed to. Mr. Man picks up a plastic squirt bottle and tosses it into the giant cart I'm clinging to and we continue our backward search. Tough shopping against the flow of the people. Yes, we received many disdainful looks, but our determination to find the beginning buoyed after hearing a couple other shoppers ask sales people where the exit was or how to get out?  (Pride kept us from asking where the entrance was) Mistake 5.

Mr. Man suggests we start marking knotches in furniture so we'll know if we came this way before. After more than 30 minutes of this upstream fight, we find an area full of shopping carts like I have. A helpful lady asks if we would like one. "NO!" I abandon my cart, and the spray bottle and we progress up to a second floor where we find the beginning of this massive place.

Thankfully the restaurant, rest rooms and more baskets reside here. We have arrived. Reset the mind to start again after taking a break . NOW we are doing it right. As we make the show room rounds, admiring how streamlined and clean every thing looks, we decide this is never going to be us. The aisles are like the 91 freeway, and clog to full stop. Screaming children demanding stuffed monkeys and plastic colorful cups. I'm ready to call it a day.  Exiting,  following the arrows.

 

Passing up all the glass ware, bedding, pillows that appear flat before they're ever used and furniture that requires assembly.  We pass a knotched  wall divider. Mr. Man claims we've been here before, yet it doesn't look familiar from this direction. Pushing our way downstream, we finally get the store flow. Oh, and there's a map of how to find stuff......at the beginning! THAT would have been a useful little pamphlet. 

Seeing the exit light ahead, we get to the cashiers. About 50 of them processing hundreds of people pushing giant cart loads of everything. IKEA doesn't have bags. You have to purchase them. No problem . We don't need a bag. That spray bottle fits just fine in my left hand!

Total time in IKEA- 1 hour , 20 minutes.
Time spent lost- 30 minutes.
Total amount purchase- $.99
Time of planned return- 3 years, or until I learn to like fish paste. . . (smorgaskaviar) 

Note to self. ......... re-read this BLOG!

A little stroll through the south.

I have just returned from a little trip to the south. Starting in Virginia, we drove down to Charleston, SC , then to Savannah, Georgia and ended up in Pensacola, Florida.  The trip was to incorporate as many new sites  as we could during the recent naval relocation of my flying sea monkey.

We took the poor man's tour in Charleston and acquired a AAA travel book with a detailed walking route outlined in it. We found parking easily and only 2 blocks from where the tour began. The book was handy with its detailed information about the historic significance of the buildings and the various sights. It was a pleasant adventure, and one we could share with my grand-dog. After hour 2, the heat became stifling and we were out of water. Only 95 degrees. No biggie. We stopped in a memorial park and sat in the shade, but the panting just got worse. Luckily, the Charleston Historic Preservation Society was across the street. The ladies there welcomed us into the very nice store, giving us water, snack, and restroom access. The place was air conditioned to 68 degrees. A delightful place. I stopped panting. . . .and so did the dog. I credit them for saving me from heat stroke. We weren't really on a time schedule, but needed to be in Savannah before dark so we could find our way. 

On the road from Charleston to Savannah, I began counting the number of exploded tires left along the roadside. Some were intact, some were shredded tread. To be sure, there is some problem with tires and southern road touring. From Charleston to Savannah, I counted 107 "dead tires". Unbelievable luck of the motorists to lose a tire out there in the middle of the freeway in the heat of the day! I began to worry about the state of our tires and we became determined not to be numbered amongst the dead tire count!

Arriving in Savannah was like driving up to a movie set. The trees dripping with the Spanish moss, the steamy streets and the smell of the grasses. The many homes with wrought iron gates and balconies were beautiful. We had a bucket list of things to see and do here and only 1 1/2 days to do it all. We got started right off the bat and drove through all the historic districts, narrated by the AAA tour guide book, and found ourselves eating dinner at Leopold's ice cream parlor. Who doesn't love ice cream for dinner? Totally worth the wait. The line went out the door and to the corner  , but it went fast. We tasted 6 flavors and settled on 2.

We took a paid guided walking tour with Savannah Dan. He is a native to Savannah and grew up with a passion for the city's history. We did a 2 hour walking tour around 4 of the town squares, hearing the in depth history about the residents who walked these same streets in the 1700's.

 

During one of the stops for a lecture, a young lady fell flat on her face, overcome by the heat of the day. My brain switched to nurse mode, but not as fast as the sea monkey's. She thrust her tote bag, back pack, camera, and dog into my arms and ran over to the fallen girl. Proud of her as she acted as a first responder, and seeing that the girl was pale but breathing, I stayed back with the bags and the barking dog. Sea Monkey got the pleasure of removing the chewing gum out of the girls mouth and checking for pulse. Cool cloths were applied to her head and neck as her parents, who had been walking around with her, removed frozen water bottles from their packs and strategically placed them on their fallen daughter. 9-1-1 was called, and Savannah Dan continued his lecture, admonishing us to  drink water and wear a hat.

The group of us stood there and enjoyed a liter of water each before continuing.

My Sea Monkey was put out because I didn't beat her to the dropped girl . I explained that somebody filled my arms with bags, cameras and barking pets, so I would get the "next one".

I think we covered Savannah well for the amount of time we had. Surely there was more to see and do, however the heat of the afternoon was prohibitive. Definitely enjoyed the tour of the Juliette Gordon Lowe house, founder of the Girl Scouts. So many years of our life were spent supporting and acting as Scouts.

Our trips end to Pensacola, Florida was uneventful except for the 96 degrees weather accompanied by torrential downpour bordering on hurricane force.



Definitely will be heading to the south again. We were told a week after our visit that our Charleston walk was on the hottest recorded day so far. So now I can claim I survived and didn't have heat stroke.  The people were lovely and friendly. I surely wished we had been able to be there in the Fall or spring when its cooler.

So IF you go, wear your hat, drink lots of water and try to seek out the shade from the many trees lining the streets. And really absorb some of that southern food and southern charm.